Haha, remember that, “Hello World”? For anyone that took computer programming in high school (talkin’ 80s here), it was the first thing you learned to program that would pop up on the screen. Or, if you’re, say, a 34 year old that graduated with a computer science degree and spent nerdy time being a software engineer, then you’ve seen it more than you care to note. And you’ve probably left that all behind anyway, and transformed your life into something much more interesting and socially savvy…like, getting a 2nd degree in graphic design, and becoming all designery and hip, and starting your own food blog, and taking an interest in mid century modern design, and being published to talk about food and design…and yeah, stuff like that. Wha? No? Damn.
From nerdy-land it roughly translates to, “I have arrived, I am here on this planet, this is my mark!” So it’s poignant I use it today as my intro, because it feels like I’ve been gone for forever, doesn’t it? Feels that way to me. Me = bad blogger. But, but, but, I have a good excuse! But wait, really, I do…well, sorta’, okay, not really.
Lesse’, what have I been doing to keep myself so busy I couldn’t take time out of my day to give forth to my loyal followers (deep, heartfelt thanks to all 5 of you…especially the phone calls harassing me to post, no, seriously)? Well, my life kinda’ imploded a few months ago…3 months today, actually. After working (read: over-working and suffering thru 3 years without a raise, prior to which I’d just bought my first house!), at a job for 8.5 years, I was unceremoniously called into a boardroom and told my services were no longer needed, my position had been eliminated. Yeah, fun, right?
So my almost 9 years fit into 2 quaint shipping boxes…crazy, right?
And so those came home with me and promptly went into my spare bedroom closet, and then I began to bake, and bake, and can jams, and bake, and cook. And then I started driving all over town and thrusting these baked and canned goodies upon people: friends, chef-friends, Sicilian master bakers (Hi Mary), neighbors. It felt good just to give…to give something that was a part of me to people who would respect it and embrace me, and be grateful to just be thought of. This lasted about 2 weeks and then I saw this quote on a friend’s FB page: “We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” ~E. M. Forster
I realized at that moment just how relieved I was, and just how unhappy I’d become because of certain people and circumstances I was surrounded with each day, and why I had ever let it into my life was beyond me. And why I had never done anything to correct it sooner. I should have been making the best choices for me, and not hoping in the end people would do the right thing or fulfill promises made. Baking I know, cooking I trust, putting love into something you turn around and give to people for nourishment…that is a no brainer.
And so I taped that quote to my fridge, and promised myself I would try to let things in, and not be so type-A controlling about every aspect of my life. And oddly enough, I didn’t have this sense of constant worry, something was calming me. To me my life was chaos, or rather, should have been chaos. “OMG, no job, what’s a gal to do, everything is gonna’ go in the sh!tter.” And then things started to happen. People were reaching out in their own ways, which I tried to reject at first, I didn’t want pity. But as my friend Ben reminded me, I must let people do things for me sometimes…it’s what people do when someone is in need.
It started with daily calls of people wanting to take me to lunch. Then I got invited to a fun July 4th party. Someone baked me a cherry pie (Hi Diane)! My Dad paid the last 4 payments of my car note (awesomest Dad, ever). I started getting up at 7am to walk The Katy Trail on mornings. I picked up extra shifts at my part-time job, and met 4 new customers who were canning enthusiasts. Got published with my 7th write-up for Modern Dallas on Il Cane Rosso. Started interning at a PR office in trade for learning this new industry and a workspace to call my own (Starbucks got old). Met new Dallas food bloggers via Twitter and a fundraiser I worked at Dallas Farmers Market. Got invited to go on a road trip with 2 of my best boys to Albuquerque (Hi Ben and David). Went to a fancy dinner put on by Matt McCallister and my dear friend Brandi’s boyfriend picked up the tab (Hi Jimmy). Won 2 blue ribbons at the TX State Fair for tomato preserves and strawberry-mint preserves. Was given an all expenses paid ticket for a girls trip to Palm Desert to hang out with my best friend since 2nd grade, (I think I fainted on this one), and found out my other 2 best boys, (Hi Mark and David), will be there at the same time! Worked a fancy VIP party for my catering friend and got to work in the trenches alongside her (Hi Ann). Won an Artizone gift card online for $25 worth of gourmet eats – I never win anything! Got invited to a restaurant opening. Got asked to be on the Chefs for Farmers committee.
I mean, it’s insane! The universe was definitely trying to tell me something, and I’ve felt the slightest push forward on my shoulder this entire time. And do you see the pattern? Food, foodies, food world, etc., etc. So, it’s only fitting I’ve been in talks with a possible employer who’s clientele is all restaurants, food distributors, and chefs. And, as you can imagine, I’m chomping at the bit for this opportunity. But I must be patient, and not push it. I have to just let the cards fall where they may…but could I just this once be a magician and make it happen already!? lol
So I give a shout-out to all who have lent a helping hand, even the smallest gestures, you have no idea. All of them together has made this massive snowball of love and support, and I’ve been blown away. Pinching myself regularly it’s so crazy, and so I let it ride, riding it out to see what happens next.
And this is just some of where I’ve been in the last 3 months, of which blog posts are to come – promise: